Being a Mom is my greatest accomplishment in life.
There is nothing I wanted more, and nothing that will ever make me feel as full as being the mother of my daughter.
Being a Mom is an impossible task.
The expectation to be perfect, to have zero screen time, to feed our kids only organic foods—the list goes on and on. From never-ending to-do lists, to misinformation, to ever-evolving trends, the pressure to get it right and be “influencer cool” is real.
But most of us aren’t influencer cool. We cant follow every single trend—heck, I don’t even understand the meaning behind “Sigma” and I feel like the kids have been saying that for a while now! (I’m literally at the age where I don’t understand the cool hip lingo…when did I get so old?).
I feel like the most common “Mom types” I see are the Crunchy and Scrunchie moms. They dominate social media tags and are included in Instagram handles. Do I fall into one of these categories?
I suppose if I were to label myself, I’d consider myself as a Scrunchie mom.
My child is vaccinated and I wholeheartedly support vaccines. I can understand peoples fear, but the scientific information is out there, it’s available to the public for free. We have almost eradicated diseased due to the invention of vaccines.
If you’re on the fence, check out the link below from UNICEF featuring Dr. Mike. If you haven’t heard of him, Dr. Mike is an American physician who immigrated from Russia as a child—and yes, he’s also a social media personality. (He was even voted Sexiest Doctor Alive by People magazine in 2015! And 10 years later, I’ll say it’s still true.) He shares a lot of fun, informative content on YouTube and is a strong advocate for children and transparency in medicine and vaccines.
https://www.unicefusa.org/stories/doctor-mike-vaccines-lets-not-let-misinformation-win
I also use disposable diapers. I allow my child to watch some television (mostly music and nursery rhymes that we sing and dance to—but she also loves cat videos. That’s probably thanks to my inner millennial). We watch a lot of Bounce Patrol—they only fuel my dream of moving to Australia (a story for another day!).
We also do our best to get outside every day. I think it’s important to get the fresh air, enjoy nature, and learn about the world around us—including how we can protect and preserve it. We can learn about worms, birds and other various bugs. (I HATE bugs…) But we love to get dirty, play in the sprinkler, and blow bubbles into the wind.
My daughter is a year and a half old and we’re still breastfeeding. I count myself lucky to be able to breastfeed at all, and I 100% believe that fed is best. The stigma behind not breastfeeding, using formula, or breastfeeding “too long”….it’s all just noise. Honestly, breastfeeding was my biggest postpartum fear— but luckily, she latched and was ready to go as soon as she was born!
We also chose to do baby-led weaning. If you have food, you BETTER be sharing. Shes also more of a savory food kind of kid. She literally threw a piece of donut the other day in the back of the car—so I stopped and got her french fries. That’s right, donut and french fries. (But you know when the “We’ve been in the car too long and if I don’t get a snack I’m gonna scream” moment is coming…and we were moments from it!) But when we can afford it, I’ll get the organic fruit and veggies.
I had a medicated birth (kinda), but all the power to those who don’t! I had a very complicated birth, and the epidural didn’t work (the pain is REAL)! But ended up medicated in the end. (The last hour) (I’ll link my birth story once I finish writing it!)
I even co-sleep with my child. It started out as a necessity—the only way I was getting any rest was with a mattress butted up against her crib. But that turned into sharing a bed. And at a year and a half, we still do this every night. It works for us for now, and I love how close it has made her and I.*
This is just a snippet of my beliefs as a mom.
A reminder that, at the end of the day, we really aren’t all that different. That each and every one of us is doing the best we can with what we know—and that we are learning as we go. There is no manual for motherhood, we get to learn as we go and pick up the pieces as they fall.
At the end of the day, I feel like most of us fall into the Scrunchy mom category. We do the best that we can, with what we have, and the resources we have access to. We want our children to have better than we did when we were growing up.
It’s OKAY for us to have different opinions than other moms. Every child is unique. Every child Is different and needs different care. I stand by the choices I make as a parent. I love my daughter more than anything I’ve ever loved before, and I will always do anything in my power to make sure she has everything she needs, and knows she is loved beyond measure.
So, regardless of whatever Box the world tries to fit you into, regardless of how the world tries to stereotype us, scare us, or shame us—stand strong. We are mothers. We brought life into this world. We get to shape it. We get to enjoy watching our children learn and play, grow and thrive. Motherhood is a gift, don’t let anyone make you think otherwise.
Don’t let the naysayers get you down. Do your research on the world, but also follow your gut. You got this Mama, and I’m right here with you.
*Just a note that I’m not a doctor or a specialist in any way. None of this information is to be taken as advice, but is an insight as to how I go about my life and what I do with my family.