Discover 8 different mom types. What kind of Mom you are? Am I?

Image of multiple clip are mothers with their children doing various activities. With the words What kind of Mom are you?

Being a Mom is my greatest accomplishment in life.

There is nothing I wanted more, and nothing that will ever make me feel as full as being the mother of my daughter.

Being a Mom is an impossible task.

The expectation to be perfect, to have zero screen time, to feed our kids only organic foods—the list goes on and on. From never-ending to-do lists, to misinformation, to ever-evolving trends, the pressure to get it right and be “influencer cool” is real.

But most of us aren’t influencer cool. We cant follow every single trend—heck, I don’t even understand the meaning behind “Sigma” and I feel like the kids have been saying that for a while now! (I’m literally at the age where I don’t understand the cool hip lingo…when did I get so old?).

I feel like the most common “Mom types” I see are the Crunchy and Scrunchie moms. They dominate social media tags and are included in Instagram handles. Do I fall into one of these categories?

I suppose if I were to label myself, I’d consider myself as a Scrunchie mom.

My child is vaccinated and I wholeheartedly support vaccines. I can understand peoples fear, but the scientific information is out there, it’s available to the public for free. We have almost eradicated diseased due to the invention of vaccines.

If you’re on the fence, check out the link below from UNICEF featuring Dr. Mike. If you haven’t heard of him, Dr. Mike is an American physician who immigrated from Russia as a child—and yes, he’s also a social media personality. (He was even voted Sexiest Doctor Alive by People magazine in 2015! And 10 years later, I’ll say it’s still true.) He shares a lot of fun, informative content on YouTube and is a strong advocate for children and transparency in medicine and vaccines.

https://www.unicefusa.org/stories/doctor-mike-vaccines-lets-not-let-misinformation-win

I also use disposable diapers. I allow my child to watch some television (mostly music and nursery rhymes that we sing and dance to—but she also loves cat videos. That’s probably thanks to my inner millennial). We watch a lot of Bounce Patrol—they only fuel my dream of moving to Australia (a story for another day!).

We also do our best to get outside every day. I think it’s important to get the fresh air, enjoy nature, and learn about the world around us—including how we can protect and preserve it. We can learn about worms, birds and other various bugs. (I HATE bugs…) But we love to get dirty, play in the sprinkler, and blow bubbles into the wind.

My daughter is a year and a half old and we’re still breastfeeding. I count myself lucky to be able to breastfeed at all, and I 100% believe that fed is best. The stigma behind not breastfeeding, using formula, or breastfeeding “too long”….it’s all just noise. Honestly, breastfeeding was my biggest postpartum fear— but luckily, she latched and was ready to go as soon as she was born!

We also chose to do baby-led weaning. If you have food, you BETTER be sharing. Shes also more of a savory food kind of kid. She literally threw a piece of donut the other day in the back of the car—so I stopped and got her french fries. That’s right, donut and french fries. (But you know when the “We’ve been in the car too long and if I don’t get a snack I’m gonna scream” moment is coming…and we were moments from it!) But when we can afford it, I’ll get the organic fruit and veggies.

I had a medicated birth (kinda), but all the power to those who don’t! I had a very complicated birth, and the epidural didn’t work (the pain is REAL)! But ended up medicated in the end. (The last hour) (I’ll link my birth story once I finish writing it!)

I even co-sleep with my child. It started out as a necessity—the only way I was getting any rest was with a mattress butted up against her crib. But that turned into sharing a bed. And at a year and a half, we still do this every night. It works for us for now, and I love how close it has made her and I.*

This is just a snippet of my beliefs as a mom.

A reminder that, at the end of the day, we really aren’t all that different. That each and every one of us is doing the best we can with what we know—and that we are learning as we go. There is no manual for motherhood, we get to learn as we go and pick up the pieces as they fall.

At the end of the day, I feel like most of us fall into the Scrunchy mom category. We do the best that we can, with what we have, and the resources we have access to. We want our children to have better than we did when we were growing up.

It’s OKAY for us to have different opinions than other moms. Every child is unique. Every child Is different and needs different care. I stand by the choices I make as a parent. I love my daughter more than anything I’ve ever loved before, and I will always do anything in my power to make sure she has everything she needs, and knows she is loved beyond measure.

So, regardless of whatever Box the world tries to fit you into, regardless of how the world tries to stereotype us, scare us, or shame us—stand strong. We are mothers. We brought life into this world. We get to shape it. We get to enjoy watching our children learn and play, grow and thrive. Motherhood is a gift, don’t let anyone make you think otherwise.

Don’t let the naysayers get you down. Do your research on the world, but also follow your gut. You got this Mama, and I’m right here with you.

*Just a note that I’m not a doctor or a specialist in any way. None of this information is to be taken as advice, but is an insight as to how I go about my life and what I do with my family.

The Guilt of Wanting a Break from Motherhood

Is Break even the Right Word?

Because as soon as I say break, I feel the guilt rise, my heart drop, and a twinge of sadness creep in—for even wanting to be away from my baby. How could I possibly want time apart from the person I created? The one I longed for, dreamed of, and, at times, suffered to bring into this world.
How can I want to step away when she looks at me and smiles, or laughs, or yells out Mama?

I find myself feeling jealous of my husband.
He gets to wake up and shower—alone.
Get ready for work—alone.
Make breakfast—alone—without a toddler pulling at his pant leg or needing to balance a baby on his hip to stir eggs with one hand.
He drives an hour to work and an hour back—alone.

I remember those days—headed into the city, music on, or maybe a true crime podcast in the background. Alone in the car. Some days I hated the commute. But most days? I appreciated it. It was time to decompress—especially on the way home. I could get out my daily frustrations with music blasting or by diving into the twisted world of Ted Bundy.

These days, my commute is from my daughter’s room to the living room and kitchen.

It’s listening to Wheels on the Bus 1,000 times (in a row), while she asks me to switch to a different version 15 seconds in. It’s teaching her that crayons are for coloring books—not the floor.
It’s eating the rest of the mac & cheese she didn’t finish (or gave to the dogs). I still get some of my music, but only if her mood allows it. Will she want Post Malone today? (Honestly, most likely—she’s loved him since she was tiny.) Or will it be Bounce Patrol singing about the alphabet and animals? No true crime podcasts or TV unless it’s during nap time—and we’re down to one nap a day.

After the third or fourth meltdown—over something small, like not opening a cheese stick fast enough, or because I had the audacity to sit on the toilet without her in my lap—I feel myself needing a moment to myself. But those moments are rare. Even showers aren’t guaranteed “me” time. We don’t have a tub, so most nights I end up showering with her. Sink tubbie time? Exhausting. (She’d stay in there for hours if I let her.)

Lately, my husband has had to travel for work. I’m happy for him—these are great opportunities.
But I’d be lying if I said I didn’t daydream about being the one to go. A solo trip, even for a day. A hotel room. Takeout. Trashy TV. Maybe a sleeping pill and eight uninterrupted hours of sleep—something I haven’t had since pregnancy. (At no fault to my husband). But then comes the guilt.

How could I spend 24 hours away from my entire world? I’ve never even spent a night without her—not since the day she was born. But still…I need a break. Or… do I?
Is break even the right word?

Some space? Yes.
To not be needed for a little while? Absolutely.
To not have to think? Even better.

But Break feels harsh.

Merriam-Webster says a break is “to separate into parts with suddenness or violence.”
Yikes. Not exactly what I meant.

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/break

I haven’t touched a thesaurus in years, but I looked. I found “pause,” which already feels better.
Even “hesitate” pops up—and funny enough, that word fits too. Because every time I think about taking a break… I hesitate.

https://www.merriam-webster.com/thesaurus/break#thesaurus-entry-1-5

I probably haven’t looked at a Thesaurus in years. Can you think of the last time you did? I appreciate how it gives a list of the ways you may use the word break. I felt like a pause, was already a better word than break. I also find it funny that the word hesitate comes up. Because every time I think about a “break”, I also find myself hesitating.

Still, none of the words seem to really fit.

Because let’s be real: as moms, we’re usually the default parent. We carry the mental load.
And if your household is anything like mine, sometimes the only “break” in your day is a solo shower—if you’re lucky. So when those rare, extended moments of silence come? They feel like a breath of fresh air. Maybe breath is the word I’m looking for.

Yesterday, I texted my husband and said that when he got home, I needed time alone.
I wasn’t in the right headspace—after a full week of solo parenting—to show up for him and our daughter. I told him I needed a little trip to the store. Alone.

He immediately responded: “When you get back, you can shower alone too.”

It wasn’t a spa day. It was still a chore. But just knowing I could wander the aisles aimlessly? That I wouldn’t have a toddler screaming from the cart or trying to bolt toward the bananas? That I could just exist, by myself, for a bit. That was everything.

What I really need is just a moment of peace. To clear out the clutter in my brain. To exist outside of motherhood, even if just for an hour or two. Because at the end of the day, I’m more than just a mom. I’m more than just a wife. We all are. We are our own, individual people. Maybe unwind is the right word. Or reset.

Break feels too negative. I don’t want to escape my family. I don’t want to be away from my daughter. Break just doesn’t fit the emotions I actually feel. I don’t want to escape my family. I don’t want to be away from my daughter.

I just need a rest.
A pause.
An exhale.

So I can ground myself—and come back better.
A better mom. A better wife. A better me.

Do you wanna build a Snowman?

Do you wanna build a snowman? (Are you even a parent if you aren’t singing along to Frozen in your head, while you read that sentence?)

Its the end of March, lets be real, I’m TIRED of the snow. We’ve had a couple of high 40 and even 50 degree days here in Maine. It’s a real tease when the next day we get 6+ inches of snow. That’s what happened this weekend.

But we had a beautiful sunny day last week, so my sister-in-law and I took my daughter outside to play in the snow. She’s FINALLY brave enough to walk in her boots and her snow pants! It was so exciting to see her bravely stomp through the snow (even if she did fall on her face a few times). Watching her grow and try new things or re-try things that once made her scared or anxious is one of the most amazing parts of being a mom.

My sister-in-law started to roll around a ball of snow, but come to find out, she’d never built a HUGE snowman before! I knew we had to make it happen before the snow was gone! So she rolled for a while, then I did. Then I did some shaping while she chased my daughter around the yard and we rolled up the second ball of snow. (I forgot how HEAVY snow can be, it took both of us to get it onto the bottom ball.) Then lastly, the smallest for the head.

I remembered that I had got my husband some Lego theme snowman accessories and ran down to the basement to grab them. I’m so glad I did! My husband works in the Health and Safety field, so we made the snowman into one of his co-workers. Hardhat and walkie-talkie included.

This is a fun way to wrap up winter. Seeing as by the end of the day, the snowman face had melted off. Then we got snow this past weekend. I’m ready for spring. For green, for grass, hell, I’ll even take the bugs. (I don’t like bugs) I’m tired of being inside all the time and I can’t wait for us to spend our days in the yard, going for hikes, or heading to the lake. So here is my send off to winter. Snowman included. Until we revive him next year. Bring on spring!

Sundays are for Rest, Right?

Sundays Aren’t for Rest (At Least Not Yet)

In a perfect world, Sundays would be for rest. Maybe brunch, a nap, some kind of quiet reset before Monday.

But as a parent of a toddler? Yeah—there are no rest days.

Weekends are for all the big chores. The “extra” stuff that never seems to get done during the week: washing sheets and blankets, building that piece of furniture that’s been sitting in the garage for three weeks, reorganizing the fridge that’s somehow already a mess again. (I swear I threw out those leftovers last week!)

I guess, if I were a god-fearing woman, I’d find time to rest before or after church. But I’m not religious. So instead, my husband and I take turns “sleeping in” on Saturdays and Sundays (and let’s be honest, sleeping in means 8 AM if we’re lucky). The rest of the weekend is spent trying to get the house in order, tackle the groceries, and gear up for the week ahead.

The last few weekends have been even more chaotic than usual—because our daughter got her big girl bed! Which is honestly kind of bittersweet. I had planned on doing one of those cute little Montessori floor beds, but we already had a queen mattress from our old setup (we upgraded to a king when we bought the house), so it just made sense to use what we had.

After some intense internet sleuthing, I found this beautiful four-poster bed on sale, and I couldn’t pass it up. It’s solid, timeless, and should last her well into her teen years (that’s the hope, anyway). I still need to add the curtains I bought to the “posters”, but the pocket was too small, so I’ll need to sew a new one. (Link to the bedframe at the bottom! And No, I don’t get any commission!)

In other “house things that feel bigger than they are,” I also grabbed one of those behind-the-toilet storage towers. (It was on clearance—because of course it was, I love a deal.) Our old bathroom shelf used to hold all our laundry stuff, since we’ve got a stacked washer/dryer situation in our bathroon. But now that Lorelai can reach it? Not ideal. The new tower keeps things out of her hands but still accessible for us. My husband hates it. But I think it looks cute! I popped on some blue glass storage jars I scored at the Target dollar section forever ago, and honestly, it’s giving “Pinterest mom on a budget.” (I added my pintrest to the bottom, just in case.)

Eventually, I want to organize the bathroom closet and swap out the hardware on the tower shelf with these adorable shark-shaped knobs I bought ages ago. But that’s another weekend’s problem, and the knobs are somewhere, in a box, from when we moved into this house.

I guess weekends have kind of just become the default “project time” because it’s the only time it’s not just Lorelai and me at home. It’s hard to tackle anything big with a toddler glued to your leg. And evenings are dinner, bath, bedtime, and—if we’re lucky—twenty minutes of couch time before we crash.

I know it’ll get easier. When she can self-entertain a little more, when I don’t need to be on toddler-alert 24/7. And sure, I let her watch some TV here and there (I’m not above Ms.Rachel, or Bounce Patrol). But I’ve never wanted the TV to be a constant babysitter. I try to involve her when I can… but some projects just aren’t 16-month-old-friendly.And that’s just how it is right now. No rest on Sundays. No aesthetic “slow mornings.” Just a whole lot of love, a little chaos, and a house that’s always almost clean.

https://www.walmart.com/ip/Walker-Edison-Minimalist-Slatted-Wood-Queen-Canopy-Bedframe-Natural-Pine/3386377902

DIY Toddler Sensory Bin: Fun, Messy, and only cost me $5.25!

(So let me start this off by saying, this could be even LESS than $5.25. If you already own food coloring! I did not.) All you’re going to need is 2 ingredients. Food coloring, and a bag of uncooked rice. I used a 2 lb bag and I’d suggest at least 2 lbs of rice. (Also, I think you can get food coloring at Dollar Tree for $1.25. This would save you the extra $2 I spent at Walmart.) Everything else that I used for this sensory bin, were items I had around my house!

Depending on how many dishes you want to wash, (either use the 4 separate bowls, or keep reusing one, whatever floats your boat!) grab 4 bowls and evenly distribute the rice, leaving 1/5th behind in the bag. Then, add a few drops (5ish) of food coloring to each bowl. It’s kinda like Easter! But instead of eggs, it’s rice! *Bonus Activity, you could color the rice then add your Easter eggs to the bowl and swirl them around for a cool design!* Stir your rice and food coloring around until the rice is covered.

Don’t go TOO crazy, because the food coloring will only go so deep into the rice. It’ll only get so pigmented but I was pleasantly surprised that the rice dried fairly fast! Once each color is dry, mix all the rice together in a large bowl, including the rice you left white.

I initially had all the rice in a large empty seltzer water bottle. My daughter used this as a shaker for a while, it was a worthy instrument. But after some time had passed, she lost interest, and I figured it would be more fun for her to play with her hands and with some tools. But, as a parent of a Toddler, we all know how quickly a mess can happen. So I had to figure out a way for her to play with the rice, without it being ALL over my house.

I had a light bulb moment! We had just got some totes so I could do some organizing, and one of them we hadn’t put anything into yet. It was a big tote, so I knew she’d fit with room to spare. I brought over the tote and dumped the rice into it in front of her. She was FACINATED! And immediately wanted to be in the tote so she could try to put the rice back into the bottle. And thus, the Rice Sensory Bin was born!